First Draft
https://docs.google.com/a/une.edu/document/d/1MxRBL4R5sSWm_EnoUXW4R0kSrqBb6T6DTZRAUpzAWY4/edit?usp=sharing
Second Draft
https://docs.google.com/a/une.edu/document/d/1xQz3brKIRyFyiof7pSJJntwRJ4VwL5U8LsaTGQywqxI/edit?usp=sharing
Final Draft
https://docs.google.com/a/une.edu/document/d/1CCWk-Y5YaJLNz3HVz4AP_Z2YkeZscvltZKWm0h6vhCc/edit?usp=sharing
Learning Outcome 1
Writing this last essay I utilized the recursive writing process better than I had in the past two essay’s. In my first draft I typed a lot of my ideas out in a roughly organized way. I wanted to make sure I got my ideas out well and not worry too much about organization. Then after, I went back in and saw some areas to change in order to make my essay flow better. Some sentences in specific I moved to different paragraphs in order to give them a stronger presence. This gave it more of spotlight which strengthened the use of the sentence. In Nancy’s Sommers, “Revision Strategies of Student Writers and Experienced Adult Writers,” she talks about how writers will just reword sentences to make them sound better. She states, “By rewording their sentences to avoid the lexical repetition, the students solve the immediate problem, but blind themselves to problems on a textual level”(1). Another big edit was my intro paragraph as whole. Sommers talks about how experienced writers edit to seek and create new meaning and see how the structure of their writing can change and strengthen their argument. She states, “Details are added, dropped, substituted, or reordered according to their sense of what the essay needs for emphasis and proportion”(1). This kind of editing is exactly what I did to my intro paragraph as it looks significantly different than it looked from the first draft. Sentences are dropped, reordered, and some have new details. These changes give it a much stronger feel than what it originally was in my first draft. This recursive editing of my paragraph organization gave my essay a much stronger and relevant argument.
Learning outcome 2
I think I utilize my sources very well in essay 3. Each quote I use, it used to strengthened my essay in it’s own way. They all have different ways of giving credibility to my arguments. I also think my sources and quotes were used very well because some were used in a Barclay’s paragraph which I used 2 different quotes from 2 different sources to strengthen my argument by comparing them. In my essay I compare Duhigg’s second step of his social change theory and show how when combined with Bill McKibben’s social change theory, greats things can happen. Then I connect it to McKibben’s theory a few sentences later, ” Bill McKibben, as mentioned earlier, fights for climate change awareness, and has a social change theory too that he mentions in, Do The Math He states, “[M]ake a little noise, be a little uncomfortable, push other people to be a little uncomfortable” (1:00). Sometimes drawing attention to yourself or your movement in what is necessary to make it relevant and heard”(4). Here I quoted from 2 different sources and was able to tie them together to strengthen my argument.
Learning Outcome 5 and 6
I feel that I have improved my MLA citing skills. That said, the improvement has been minimal because it wasn’t necessarily an area I needed improvement on. An area that does need some attention though is my local errors as I seem to make a lot of them. To improve this I think I need to read through my paper multiple times and also have someone else read it to find all the mistakes that I missed. On this last essay I was disappointed to find that most of the points that I lost were due to local errors and silly typos. Simple errors that could have been avoided if I took more time reading my essay and making sure it sounded exactly how I wanted it to. I feel as if I have made progress in this area, but still have a ways to go if I am to become a better writer.
